Friday, July 31, 2009

"Just Go For It"

here is a message i received with an important lesson i feel all my readers can benefit from. worrying about how to get girls is not what life is about.

Hey Dirkmanley,

I wanted to say that I've always respected your posts, and this email is about how your posts are finally starting to make some real sense to me. For a long time in my life I was a painfully shy guy, but more recently I've started coming out of my shell. I'd say that now I'm pretty confident and enjoy where I'm at in life.

I recently took a bootcamp and it was nice because I went into it with the mentality that I'm going to try my damndest to close. And sure enough I did a decent amount of closing - some #s and some kissing.

Tonight I had a second date with 2 chicks that I met over the bootcamp. I'm really into one of the chicks but I didn't kiss her or anything when I first met her. They took time out of their busy schedule to meet with me and my buddy (who, I should mention, has never taken a bootcamp nor knows very much about JM).

Anyway, we hit up a bar, and I go to talk with the girl I like while my buddy talks to her friend. I chatted with my girl all night long while I waited for IOIs or waited for a right time to SOI her. I'm sure you can guess what happened. No sex.

Dude, tonight I finally realized that my problem isn't that I can't carry a conversation. Trust me, there was plenty of conversation with this chick - there was WAAAAY too much conversation with this chick!

Tonight I realized my problem was that I was too much of a wuss to escalate. Plain and simple. And this is what you've been saying all along in the forum as being a huge key to sex. I realized that once a girl is willing to come out and meet you it pretty much comes down to escalating, and that I was a dumbass for waiting for her to, in essence, give me permission to escalate. I was waiting for IOIs. The mere fact that she showed up was all the evidence I needed to make a move.

You know what the funny thing was about tonight? My wing, who only knows enough about JM to know that you gotta make it sexual, chatted with my "target's" friend and quickly brought the subject to sex and fun stuff like that. He was touching her like crazy. Isn't it crazy that when you boil it down he really understands JM better than I do, even thought I've read the ebook and taken the bootcamp? Hah!

Anyway, I've learned my lesson, man. I've got 2 of your Big 3 down. I'm living the life I want and I talk to the people I want to talk to. Now it's time to man up and escalate on these women. While the bootcamp taught me a thing or two about projecting the right vibe when doing a cold approach, I think that all of that is meaningless if you don't make a move.

I used to go nuts when I read your posts because I felt you'd almost always answer forum questions with answers that boiled down to "make a move on her." I craved "game" and "conversational skills" but tonight both my lack of escalation and my friend's willingness to take risks showed me that in the end that stuff won't get you the girl. I'm spending tonight alone when that didn't need to be the case.

Anyway, I've been rambling on for a while now. The bottom line is that I think you're the man for boiling down "game" to 3 simple rules and that I now have a better appreciation for the need to take risks and make a move, even in the absence of IOIs.


i highlighted what i found funny. thanks for letting me share, XXXX. i hope others learn from it what you already have.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. what are the 3 simple rules? can you tell me please?